My relationship with food is complicated. But I think Winnie-the-Pooh can help de-construct my relationship.
What I like best
"Well," said Pooh, "what I like best," and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn't know what it was called.
I love food. Always have. I love pasta and rice. I love chips. I love chocolate and I love cake. But there are consequences when you have diabetes. Blood sugars spike; sometimes for several hours afterwards, regardless on how accurate the carb counting was, or the increase in a temporary basal (background) insulin. So I (sometimes) choose moderation. I first stop and think, can I eat this right now? And if I decide I can, I do so, sometimes with moderation, and sometimes with abandon. I may pay the price, but I do so with thought.
There is a caveat to that, in that some foods are my trigger foods, as hunny is to Pooh. These foods are not in our home. Things like Oreos. One low blood sugar, one moment of a 'panic' kind of eating as two arrows down show on my continuous glucose monitor, and most of a bag can be demolished. So I don't buy them. I make sure we have glucose tabs on hand to take care of those insane moments.
What about lunch?
It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long difficult words but rather short easy words like, "What about lunch?"
What about lunch? Dinner? Snacks? Not just because it's time. Sometimes it's because I have to. Blood sugars rue the day. High, low, or in between. I'm always aware of the question lurking in the back of my mind. Do I need to eat? What should I eat?
Ten pots of honey...
... and when the whole Escape was finished, there was Pooh sitting on his branch dangling his legs, and there, beside him, were ten pots of honey....
Food can be like medicine. Lows blood sugars, and plenty of them have taught me to consider the impact of food on my blood sugars. What 4-5 glucose tabs, test, and if necessary, another tab or two, and test again. Sometimes I choose ice cream. Because I can, and it tastes good. Not always a good choice, but it is a delicious choice.
"How long does getting thin take?" Pooh asked anxiously.
I used to care, but I don't anymore. I'm not saying I won't ever lose weight, but by now my expectations have been set that I won't ever get thin. On most days, I'm comfortable in my skin. Ask me tomorrow, and you might get another answer, but as long as I have a special someone - a Christopher Robin to care for me and who will read me stories in the meantime - I'm not worried about it.
What's for breakfast?
"When you wake up in the morning, Pooh," said Piglet at last, "what's the first thing you say to yourself?"
"What's for breakfast?" said Pooh. "What do you say, Piglet?"
I say I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" said Piglet.
Pooh nodded thoughtfully. "It's the same thing," he said.
Suddenly food isn't so complicated anymore. Sometimes living life, and eating food, is just like eating honey in the rain or being stuck in Rabbit's hole.
You just never know what surprises are waiting. Sometimes good, and sometimes not-so-good. But there's always another waking up, another breakfast to look forward to tomorrow.
How wonderful it would be if food could be eaten, with no consideration to be given to one's blood sugar. How wonderful would it be if no one had to deal with the short term challenges of low blood sugars, or the long term challenges of complications due to high blood sugars. Organizations are working on this, and funding brings research into new horizons, previously unimagined, like the Artificial Pancreas project or other new technologies.
We can make a choice - to participate, support a family member, or any one of our T1D friends who are also making a choice to support the JDRF. We can do it many ways, including supporting, or even participating in the TELUS Walk to Cure Diabetes.
No matter where you live, the JDRF is working to support you, or those you love and care for who live with diabetes. Look up your DRF chapter and find out what they are doing, to make living life with diabetes just a bit better for all of us.
This Walk raises critical funds for research focused on curing, treating and better preventing Diabetes. I am all about that!
And is it a fit? I'll let you figure that part out, and I'll just continue writing, and hope what I share with you here gives you something to reflect on.